


Milk and Citrus

by LeeLeeMak



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, demisexual niles, those last two aren't important i just wanted u to know, trans boy leo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-04-02
Packaged: 2018-10-13 19:39:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10520490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeeLeeMak/pseuds/LeeLeeMak
Summary: Owain wants to prank his boyfriend for April Fool's but doesn't realize that Niles is the prank king.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Un-beta-ed because this is April Fools and I have a date in like an hour. Also this is my first fic published in months; years if you don't count my unfinished multi-chapter (which you shouldn't) so woo yay me. I wanna write more stuff so I can get back into the groove before odiniles week.
> 
> Fun fact: I wrote this while waiting for my hair bleach to finish processing. So like. Forty minutes. Probably a little more since I had to wash the bleach out near the end. That's why it's short. And bad. Also I've never written Owain before.

 

“Just put toothpaste in his oreos, that ought to freak him out.”

Owain chewed on his straw, looking out the window as if to ignore the ridiculous suggestion. “I did that to you in seventh grade,” he finally said. “You can’t just repeat a prank.”

Inigo shrugged. “It’s not like Niles knows that.”

“It’s not about him knowing, it’s about the  _ integrity _ . I have a dark reputation to uphold!”

Inigo slumped in his seat and mumbled something Owain chose to ignore. They sat in silence for a minutes, Owain wondering how on earth he was going to think of a proper prank to fool his boyfriend, when the only other person who could possibly help entered the diner.

“Leo!” Owain vaulted up, nearly knocking his table over and spilling Inigo’s drink in his lap. He ignored his poor companion’s attempt to retrieve napkins, which just ended in more stains in the groin area than is appropriate. “My compatriot in the darkness, I require your assistance!”

Leo motioned for Takumi, who had come in with him, to join Owain and Inigo at their booth, knowing this was going to take more than a couple of minutes. “What is it, Owain?”

“I’m so thankful for your inquiry, my lord! You see...” Owain leaned into Leo’s personal space. Leo was unperturbed. “I need to prank Niles hard.”

Leo huffed, but sat down next to Owain all the same. “Is this for April Fools?”

“Oh yeah,” Takumi settled his menu down and cocked his head to the side. “That’s tomorrow. Maybe I’ll replace all your tomato juice with gatorade.”

“Do that and you’re homeless,” Leo hissed.

Takumi snickered but Owain just moaned and lowered his head to the table. “C’mon, please Leo! You’ve known him so long, you gotta know something!”

“It’ll be hard to get him, you know.” The conversation paused for a moment as Leo and Takumi ordered their drinks. Once the waiter went on his way, Leo turned back to Owain. “Niles is basically the prank king.”

“There has to be something! Anything!”

Leo looked up to the ceiling and tapped his chin. “Well, there is one thing...”

* * *

 

And that was the preface to how Niles was currently wearing a blindfold in a completely nonsexual manner. Owain had to do a lot of convincing, but in the end, Niles agreed to his little contest. Owain was almost giggling with excitement -- no, scratch that, he _was_ giggling with excitement. 

“Almost sounds like you’re having more fun than me, over there.” Niles clicked his tongue. “Shame I can’t see it.”

“Hush, foul tongue!” Niles laughed at that, given how incredibly _tame_ his statement was. “Now, our trial begins...”

Owain held a glass full of milk in front of Niles, waiting patiently for the man to reach forth and grasp it. It took him a moment to realize Niles is, indeed, blindfolded. “I’ll just, uh,” he scrambled forward and pushed the glass’s rim to Niles’s lips. 

Niles took a sip and hummed. “Chocolate.”

The reply got a nervous chuckle out of Owain, who then encouraged the man to take another sip. “There’s no chocolate in the mix, I’ve already informed you of what you’ll be tasting tonight!”

Niles hummed again after the second sip. “And nothing besides that?”

“Nothing! Not a thing!”

“Shame. Whole.”

Owain mumbled a few words of awe, pretending to write down and care about the results. He presented Niles the next glass, which was exactly the same milk just poured into a separate glass because it wasn’t the milk that mattered. Niles took a sip and smacked his lips. He tilted his head to the side but Owain couldn’t tell if he was actually thinking or just humoring him. 

“Two percent,” he finally said, and Owain broke out into a grin. He couldn’t wait to text Leo about the overwhelming success of this prank!

“Final one,” Owain says. And there, separate from the two glasses of milk, stood a proud and tall glass of orange juice. While Niles was expecting milk, he would actually be getting sweet, acidic orange juice! The surprise would activate his gag reflex, and probably make him spit up the orange juice out of his mouth! Of course, it could make the poor man vomit, but Owain would take care of that if, and only if, it happened.

He reached the glass towards Nile’s mouth and tipped, letting the orange drink hit his lips. When Niles parted his lips just so, Owain had to bite his lip to keep from laughing. This was his defining prank, he could feel it. 

“Mm!” Niles moaned. Owain let go of the glass, now being held by Niles, and doubled over laughing.

“You fell for it, you did--” But there was no orange juice spew like Owain had expected, and certainly no vomit. Instead, Niles was heartedly gulping down the juice as if it were water.

When he finished off the glass, he licked his lips. “Now that was some nice milk.”

Niles slipped off the blindfold and grinned wildly at the dumbfounded Owain. “You should know better than anyone that I don’t have a gag reflex, love.”

Owain turned his face to the floor. “You were playing me.”

“The whole time.”

* * *

 

Later, after some sorry-I-tried-to-make-you-vomit sex, Niles gently patted Owain’s head. “Don’t be so glum, there’s nothing you could have done to trick me, anyway.”

Owain nuzzled his head into Nile’s neck and whined. “I really wanted to. I thought it was a good idea when Leo told me it, I thought-- why are you laughing?”

Niles had burst into outrageous laughter, forcing them both to sit up while he tried to calm down. “Leo-- Leo gave you the idea?” Owain nodded. “Oh, love, he only knows that prank because I did it to him in seventh grade!”

Instead of a picture of Niles covered in orange juice, Leo received a string of vaguely threatening emojis that night.


End file.
